F MY LIFE

Video Master Joined: 21 May 2004 Posts: 1815

fmylife.com

F mylife is a site where people post some of the most F ed up crap thats happened to them. examples,

QUOTE
Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her leaving her room... my electric toothbrush in her hand. FML

QUOTE
Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't hang out with me because he felt really sick. I went to his house anyway to surprise him with homemade soup. I walk in to his room only to find him hooking up with my sister. She can't drive, our mom drove her there. FML

QUOTE
Today, my husband dropped me off at work, ten minutes later I got a text saying" I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said he "I dont know what youre talking about Megan". My name isnt Megan, not even close. FML

QUOTE
Today, I was rejected from the University of Washington. My dad has been a professor there for 30 years, and is on the board of admissions. FML

QUOTE
Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

QUOTE
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled : "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

Nintendo Specialist Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 1889

TPP27 wrote:

QUOTE
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled : "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

these are hilarious. Some have to be fake tho.

Kai Beginner Joined: 17 Nov 2008 Posts: 52

fake or not...it's makes me feel better about my life Razz

Kai Enthusiast Joined: 15 Jan 2008 Posts: 285

Omg i love this site. I found out about it a couple weeks ago and its just great.

Kai Beginner Joined: 11 Feb 2009 Posts: 17

TPP27 wrote:

QUOTE
Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her leaving her room... my electric toothbrush in her hand...

I don't think he's going to use that toothbrush again.

PSP Guru Joined: 07 Apr 2007 Posts: 2405

FML DOT COM wrote:

Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokemon game. He chose to play Pokemon over sex with me. FML

FAIL

Nintendo Specialist Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 1889

-Ricochet- wrote:

FML DOT COM wrote:

Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokemon game. He chose to play Pokemon over sex with me. FML

FAIL

I dont think ive ever heard sex and pokemon uttered in the same conversation before.

Kai Lover Joined: 23 Dec 2007 Posts: 911

Quote:

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

i guess her mom was hot back then rofl